How to create a startup in 2020(parody)

Amando Abreu
4 min readSep 16, 2020

So, you want to create a startup, well, sit down and let me explain how this works by telling you the story of Jane, a fictional startup founder created for this tutorial.

Finding your product

Jane could choose only one of the following ideas to pursue:

  1. A platform that uses AI to do something unspecified
  2. Food delivery by bike messenger platform
  3. Food delivery by bike messenger platform backed by blockchain

Every startup from 2020 onward needs to have either AI or blockchain, or else they’re obviously bound to fail.

Although she had other ideas, she heard that venture capitalists in her area were investing heavily in these sectors, so naturally, she decides to also pursue one of these sectors.

Investigate & learn


During the local “entrepreneur meetup”, where she meets unsuccessful wannapreneurs trying to get leads, someone tells her about all the books she should read before getting started with her own startup, the list includes “The Lean Startup” and “The 4 hour work-week”.

Jane is overwhelmed by so many books, so someone else suggests that she learns how to speed-read. She reads all the books in about 2 days, and due to the speed-reading she doesn’t actually learn or remember anything. But the dopamine released in the brain from simply reading the book is enough to feel like it was time well spent.

Someone told her she has to speak to people about her idea, so she asks everyone. Friends, family, co-workers, everyone!


After being very pumped up about the idea for 2 weeks, it becomes obvious that she needs to work full-time on this, so she quits her job.

She works a solid 12 hours per day on the idea for about a year, designs are made, she meets with VCs, and possible clients. All the clients want to shape the idea their own way, which means she has about 70 features needed for the MVP to satisfy all the clients.

Since the idea doesn’t solve an actual problem, she has to make a problem and then solve it. Possible clients are just confused, and to be nice give…